Other women don’t tell you when you come back

exhausted from layovers and daylong conferences and being around strangers who don’t run to hugs, your son will be somewhat apathetic. He will smile and say Mama and kiss you when you ask for it. He will adore the plane you purchased for him at the airport gift shop, which makes “real” plane sounds that [...]

Other women don’t tell you that you will find:

your son’s rubber shark toy in the pocket of your raincoat when you arrive over a half-hour late to the bar for the mom’s night out you had organized only coated one of your eye’s lashes is successfully coated in mascara you scrambled to put on as your son screamed for you to come back [...]

Other women don’t tell you when you choose to leave (and you will)

you won’t go very far. And you will see your son everywhere. When you go away for two nights in January, not for a conference or obligation or commitment, but wholly for yourself, to celebrate a friend’s birthday, those two days pass the way of his childhood, in a flash and eternity at once. Before [...]

Other women don’t tell you what you will learn when you ask your child about love

He will tell you he loves himself. When he first begins talking, he will press his palms into his chest and say his name as emphatically as he can, despite being unable to pronounce the soft middle “L” yet, or the final hard consonant “N.” Who do you love? You will ask him. And he [...]

Other women don’t tell you that when your child is sick (the languages of need and want)

A small part of you will enjoy it. Not his sore throat, because you would take all of his pain for yourself if you could. Not his restless turning in bed, his sweaty body tangled in a mess of blankets and pillows and sheets, and you can’t seem to find the right amount of layers [...]

Other women don’t tell you it only gets harder

Because who needs that kind of honesty when you are already struggling? So instead, they tell you it gets easier. Instead, they say, you’ll find a routine and get used to things, and of course, this too, is true. You do get used to things, because a human being can get used to anything. And [...]

Other women don’t tell you when it really starts (or how terrible twos hit like clockwork)

November 6th Because any day can feel like the beginning of a new phase in your child’s development. Because every day is, to some extent. Phases. It’s really all about phases. Motherhood and life. But that day, when the terrible two’s really hit, you couldn’t have predicted it or really prepared. And you feel completely [...]

Other women don’t tell you what the lack of sleep really comes from

Yes, he didn’t sleep through the night for most of his first year. And the first time he did, it was a fluke on the anniversary of being outside in the world as long as he’d slept inside of you. You celebrated the next morning with brunch and by midnight, he was burning up and [...]

Other women don’t tell you that you forget how to be alone (first day of school moments)

Not that you were any good at it before or even knew how to be alone really. But now, it’s a feeling you don’t understand. You don’t know what to do with your hands. Your body and mind feel foreign to you as though you are alone but with a stranger at the same time. [...]

Other women don’t tell you how to teach love in the midst of such hate

You will recall that moment more often than you wish. The time he was the size of a banana inside you, a crescent moon waxing bigger with each passing day. You stood beyond the gates of Auschwitz, where buses come to bring people from all over Poland and take them back to their large, homogenous, [...]